This work pertains to the cultivation of victim mentality relating to the imprinted memory bank of life experiences that left a mark that remained misinterpreted, becoming the neurotic basis of confused vindication-seeking as both abuser and bitch under one shifting mask.
I take my own inspiration from growing up abused by an alcoholic, a bottomless pit of sarcasm and self-loathing informed to some extent by what played out as the Vietnam war. This enables me to connect more intimately to certain points of history beyond my own life experience.
This is an example of something to take away from abuse aside from the deterministic chip on the shoulder and the passing down to future generations the unresolved conflict that morphs into something increasingly retarded until it is finally dealt with by someone capable of calling things by their true name. Self-deceit encapsulates all of it, the virus of the hapless sucker incapable of recognizing a true enemy if it sodomized their entire community, and often has to join some phantom-fucking bandwagon in order to cope with this emotional void.
Emaciation, atrophy and entropy have always been an odd fixation of mine, and in the last few years of my father’s life he had the physique of a plantation slave. This is not so much a portrayal of him and me as much as it is an illustration of a virus that plays itself out in a virtual deterministic way until the individual develops some capacity to recognize their own reflection, as well as the secret love affair with the object of their hatred.